What Are You Telling Yourself? Changing the Thoughts That Shape Your Life (Revisit) | Ep. 35

Most of us can point to something we'd like to change about the way we live. It's much harder to notice the thought or belief that keeps feeding the behavior in the first place. 

That's where this conversation begins.

Nino opens with Romans 12:2 and Paul's invitation to be transformed by changing the way we think. Maria then shares something much more ordinary: a family Christmas tradition that no longer felt right. What began years ago as a meaningful way to give gifts had gradually become a process of wish lists, checking boxes, trying to keep things equal, and wondering whether any of it still felt much like giving at all.

Her decision to change the tradition becomes a simple example of something much bigger. Sometimes we continue doing things because we've always done them that way. Sometimes an old belief is still quietly influencing a current decision. And sometimes we don't even realize what we're telling ourselves until we slow down long enough to notice it.  

Maria explains how those beliefs often develop early, become deeply rooted, and eventually operate so automatically that we're more likely to notice the emotion they create than the belief itself. An event happens, an unnoticed thought gives it meaning, an emotion follows, and our behavior responds. Over time, the result can reinforce the very belief that started the cycle.  

That raises a much more hopeful question: if some of those scripts are no longer true, do we have to keep believing them?

Nino and Maria talk about identifying the script, rewriting it, testing the new belief through different choices, and allowing new experiences to reinforce what is true. Nino connects that process back to Scripture and the work God does as His truth takes root in us. Transformation isn't simply deciding to behave differently. It's learning to recognize what isn't true and repeatedly returning to what God says is true.  

Later, two questions about spending make the idea practical. One person has already shifted from thinking about a "no-spend" season to a more intentional "low-spend" approach. Another describes herself as an impulsive shopper, calls her own question stupid, says she can't continue living this way, and doesn't know where to begin. Rather than jumping immediately to spending tips, Nino and Maria pay attention to the words underneath the problem and explore how changing the internal conversation may help create space for a different next step.  

Sometimes the first thing that needs to change isn't what we're doing.

It's what we've been believing.

In this episode

Why transformation begins with the way we think

How deeply rooted beliefs can shape emotions and behavior without us realizing it

Recognizing the internal scripts we repeat to ourselves

Why changing a belief takes more than simply saying something different

Replacing old scripts with truth and reinforcing them through new choices

What gift giving can reveal about expectations, obligation, and intention

Why "no spend" and "low spend" can create very different ways of thinking

How shame-filled language can keep us from asking for help

Bringing the thoughts we repeatedly believe back to Scripture

Weekly Challenge

Choose one area of your life that either feels like a sore spot right now or is something you'd genuinely like to strengthen. It might be your marriage, parenting, finances, work, health, relationships, or another area God has entrusted to you.

For the next several days, pay attention to the thoughts that repeatedly show up around that one area. Write them down when you notice them.

Then take a closer look at the thoughts that keep returning and ask a simple question:

Does this align with what is true in Scripture?

If it doesn't, you aren't required to keep believing it.

The goal isn't to manufacture a more positive thought. It's to recognize what you've been believing and begin replacing what isn't true with the truth God has given you.  

Community Invitation

As you listen, consider one thought or belief that may have been shaping your life longer than you've realized. Sometimes simply becoming aware of the script is the beginning of seeing it differently.

If you'd like to continue these conversations with others who are learning to bring every area of life back into alignment with Christ, we'd love to have you join the Christ Centered Stewardship Facebook Group.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/christcenteredstewardship

Hosted by: Nino Villa and Maria Casillas